Go the F Away (Kindle Edition)
By Julie Smith
Review & Description
ENDORSED BY DEAD AND IMAGINARY PARENTS THE WORLD OVER!
EVEN ONE UNDEAD! (AND THE ODD LIVE ONE)
The perfect gift for anyone whose kids have boomeranged
“We never saw a night alone. We never had coffee a deux. Yet we know how other parents live, and what peace and quiet must be.” -Mr. and Mrs. Edward Dickinson, parents of Emily
“Okay, one last try. If this book doesn’t get that kid to Go the F*** Away, he’s goin’ the F*** to sleep. With the fishes.” -Tony Soprano, father of A.J.
“First I make her immortal and then I keep her around for sixty years. And what does she do? She tries to kill me! Where was this book when I needed it?” -The Vampire Lestat, father of Claudia
“Five daughters still at home? FIVE?? The only time we ever smile is when we’re reading this book.” -Mr. and Mrs. Bennet, parents of Elizabeth
“The cat’s not the only one up here on the damn roof! It’s the only place Big Daddy and I can get way from Brick and Maggie’s screamin’ fights. Guess what we’re readin’ up here?” -Big Mama, mother of Brick
WHAT YOU'RE BUYING
An unabashed parody of Adam Mansbach’s hilarious parody of sappy beddy-bye books, this is GO THE F**K TO SLEEP for the empty-nester wannabe. It follows a pair of hapless parents as they suffer through their kid’s first arrest, first college graduation, subsequent degree collections, first wedding, first divorce, second wedding, and frequent freeloading. All in twenty pages. NOTE: THIS IS A VERY SHORT BOOK. YOU CAN READ IT IN FIVE MINUTES. BUT FIVE MINUTES OF LAUGHS FOR NINETY-NINE CENTS? SUCH A DEAL!
BAD ECONOMY, TERRIBLE SITUATION, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO BUT LAUGH?
“Now that I think about it, the answer was so much simpler! If my dear lost son had just gone the f*** away, I’d never have known what he was. And he might not have gotten eaten.” -Violet Venable, mother of Sebastian
“My Howie wouldn’t just go and get his Ph.D and NOW look! What the hell would I do without this book?” -Mrs. Wolowitz, mother of Howard
“I wished I'd had the Go-the-F***-to-Sleep book when I had small children; now I wish insanely that I'd had Go the F*** Away when those same children looked as if they were going to have to be shoveled out the door.” -Patty Friedmann, mother of recent college graduates.
“This is the story of my life! Whydaya think I drink so much?“ Mrs. Irene Reilly,” mother of Ignatius
Best uses for GO THE F TO SLEEP: 1. Cheer-up gift for the boomeranged-upon 2. Gentle hint for the boomerangee 3. Graduation present--for the grad’s parents 4. Stocking stuffer for anyone with a new Kindle
ENDORSED BY DEAD AND IMAGINARY PARENTS THE WORLD OVER!
EVEN ONE UNDEAD! (AND THE ODD LIVE ONE)
The perfect gift for anyone whose kids have boomeranged
“We never saw a night alone. We never had coffee a deux. Yet we know how other parents live, and what peace and quiet must be.” -Mr. and Mrs. Edward Dickinson, parents of Emily
“Okay, one last try. If this book doesn’t get that kid to Go the F*** Away, he’s goin’ the F*** to sleep. With the fishes.” -Tony Soprano, father of A.J.
“First I make her immortal and then I keep her around for sixty years. And what does she do? She tries to kill me! Where was this book when I needed it?” -The Vampire Lestat, father of Claudia
“Five daughters still at home? FIVE?? The only time we ever smile is when we’re reading this book.” -Mr. and Mrs. Bennet, parents of Elizabeth
“The cat’s not the only one up here on the damn roof! It’s the only place Big Daddy and I can get way from Brick and Maggie’s screamin’ fights. Guess what we’re readin’ up here?” -Big Mama, mother of Brick
WHAT YOU'RE BUYING
An unabashed parody of Adam Mansbach’s hilarious parody of sappy beddy-bye books, this is GO THE F**K TO SLEEP for the empty-nester wannabe. It follows a pair of hapless parents as they suffer through their kid’s first arrest, first college graduation, subsequent degree collections, first wedding, first divorce, second wedding, and frequent freeloading. All in twenty pages. NOTE: THIS IS A VERY SHORT BOOK. YOU CAN READ IT IN FIVE MINUTES. BUT FIVE MINUTES OF LAUGHS FOR NINETY-NINE CENTS? SUCH A DEAL!
BAD ECONOMY, TERRIBLE SITUATION, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO BUT LAUGH?
“Now that I think about it, the answer was so much simpler! If my dear lost son had just gone the f*** away, I’d never have known what he was. And he might not have gotten eaten.” -Violet Venable, mother of Sebastian
“My Howie wouldn’t just go and get his Ph.D and NOW look! What the hell would I do without this book?” -Mrs. Wolowitz, mother of Howard
“I wished I'd had the Go-the-F***-to-Sleep book when I had small children; now I wish insanely that I'd had Go the F*** Away when those same children looked as if they were going to have to be shoveled out the door.” -Patty Friedmann, mother of recent college graduates.
“This is the story of my life! Whydaya think I drink so much?“ Mrs. Irene Reilly,” mother of Ignatius
Best uses for GO THE F TO SLEEP: 1. Cheer-up gift for the boomeranged-upon 2. Gentle hint for the boomerangee 3. Graduation present--for the grad’s parents 4. Stocking stuffer for anyone with a new Kindle
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